caterpillar talk

A thousand moments.
They’re like a bag of tiny diamonds glittering in a black heart.
– Inman in Cold Mountain

in a moment: a hint of a smile can turn into a wide grin, an observation can pave way for a new idea, a voice can falter, a memory can fade, a song can reverberate, a heart can die, a hope can be strengthened, opportunity can be lost, trust can be regained, love can grow, hate can be sowed, laughter can echo, tears can flow, life can be taken away, a kiss can be blown, axes can fall, a friendship can start, words can hurt, a miracle can happen, a dream can come true, a world can shake…

moments are brief, indefinite intervals of time. although brief, so much can happen while they last and there’s no precise way of telling when they really end — one just knows when they’re up. they can be easily qualified, but to quantify them is another matter. making them count is one thing, counting them is another thing.

i could count my life in decades, in years, in months, in weeks, in hours, in minutes, in seconds, in milliseconds, even in microseconds or nanoseconds or picoseconds or femtoseconds… but i do not choose to do that. life’s meanings would only be utterly lost in such an OC exercise. what are those numbers, what are those figures that represent how long i’ve lived if they can’t tell how i’ve lived?

i choose to treasure the moments instead. it is true that i can’t stop the sands of time from falling and neither can i stop the coming of the next second, but i can try to make the moments — particularly the good ones — last… in my head, in my heart.

a thousand heartwarming moments are treasures that all the money in the world can’t buy, but i can have them. you can have them, too.

does everyone have a soul? what happens to your soul when you die? if you don’t believe in a soul, do you still have one? do you believe in soulmates? do soulmates always end up together?

these are the questions posted by kara and tamela, two souls who stumbled upon this blog and gamely left some things for me to ponder upon…

-¤-

we know, we feel, we crave because of the soul.

it nags the heart, it fuels the mind, and it drives the body. it is wisdom, it is emotion, it is values, it is consciousness rolled into one. it is neither good nor evil. it is both our master and our slave. it is also a lot of things in between.

it surrounds us and it is in all of us. it is what constantly motivates us to become… to bask in joys… to suffer pains… to ceaselessly ask questions… to seek answers… to truly live… to dare. it is the child in us. it is the conscience. it is the bearer of pains. it is the mover. it asks to be fed when it is hungry. it longs to be taken care of. it demands attention. it is a seeker, it thirsts for adventures. it is a questor. it builds dreams, drives dreams, desires dreams, tests dreams, and celebrates the fulfillment of dreams. it undergoes growth and decay and experiences high and low, depending on how its needs are met.

the soul, however, is not merely a spirit that dwells in us. it is not something which floats about or appears like a bubble and then pops out when we die. i believe that the soul lingers long after our hearts stop beating, long after our brains stop functioning, and long after our bodies stop working. however, it does not live on as a wisp of smoke or column of air or some cute and squishy white stuff like casper, but as feelings and memories that we leave on other beings here on earth… in the galaxy… and in the universe.

the human soul transcends barriers and makes man one with what surrounds him. because it is in touch with the universe — whose soul drives all interactions — the human soul defies the limits and enables the mind to imagine such thoughts as laughing cows and drives one to even ask, “if cows could laugh, would milk come out of their noses?” and drives another to answer, “milk comes out of mammalian tits, not noses.”

in essence, the soul represents our journey through life — through the world, in the world, through the mind, in the mind, through the expanse of the cosmos, and in the cosmos.

because of the gazillion possibilites of interactions stretched over a wide space, our souls may not get to meet all the other souls there are in this world (and more so, in this universe). however, it is still nice to think that — out there, somehow — we are bound to meet the souls which we are meant to spend our lifetimes with. if not, it is a comforting thought that there are other souls to meet and interact with and that we can still make the most out of our respective journeys.

-¤-

s-o-u-l. four letters. one word. an abstract concept, it is intangible. as such, it cannot be seen and it cannot be touched. still, it can be felt and it can be believed in by those who choose to believe — by people such as i (and perhaps by people such as you)… by people who acknowledge the existence of others’ souls even if the others themselves don’t.

it sounds like love, isn’t it? but i guess, love is a far greater concept than the soul.

shaks. murag malumos ko sa kalalom.

“Forgiveness is the fragrance that the flower leaves
on the heel of the one who crushed it.”
–Mark Twain

in my presence…
the greens are blushing,
the rocks are dancing,
the waters are singing,
the trees are smiling.

in my silence…
the crickets are whispering,
the birds are whistling,
the bees are humming,
the butterflies are talking.

in my patch under the sky…
the wildflowers are breathing,
the wind is cheering,
the earth is rejoicing,
a star is flying!

in my universe…
i am not on my own,
i am not alone,
i’ve found my Eden,
i’m close to home.

-=-vkpm, 2005-=-

“We find greatest joy, not in getting, but in expressing what we are… Men do not really live for honors or for pay; their gladness is not the taking and holding, but in doing, the striving, the building, the living. It is a higher joy to teach than to be taught. It is good to get justice, but better to do it; fun to have things but more to make them. The happy man is he who lives the life of love, not for the honors it may bring, but for the life itself.”
– RJ Baughan

letting the gift go
-=-vkpm, 2005-=-

because i’ve held it in my hands for so long;
because it asks to be set free;
because it looks at me in the eyes,
silently accusing me of hurting and killing;
because i cannot bear to be reminded of that accusation
every time i see it sulk a little more
for every moment that passes;
because i have no wish for it to die;
because i am convinced that it deserves to take flight;
because it is also my desire to see it soar so high –
higher than i or anyone can ever go;
because to grant it its freedom is my choice to make;
because to loosen my grip means i’m going to trust;
because i am wrong and it is right –
i cannot protect it forever from the harsh realities of the world,
the universe will nonetheless conspire to protect it for me.
i just have to believe that it shall live… it will live
to make somebody else as happy as i will be.

fusion
-=- vkpm, 2004 -=-

i am water…
deep yet free flowing,
meandering, sometimes raging.

i am fire…
burning, blazing,
shining, igniting.

i am wind…
chilling, freezing,
tingling, biting.

i am earth…
brimming, evolving,
breathing, living.